Mothering Subsequent Children

Secondary infertility is more common among mothers who have lost children to adoption than among the general population, a finding that has been replicated in several research studies. One study in particular also found that 20-30 percent of exiled mothers chose not to have any more children.

Of the mothers who did go on to have more children, some reported an increased sense of guilt and regret about the adoption after their other children were born. They experience a wide range of feelings, including a sense of over-protectiveness to their child and also fear that something or someone would take their children away.

Mothers who have experienced adoption loss must be treated with extra sensitivity when pregnant and birthing additional children. The trauma of losing one child to adoption is likely to resurface at such an emotional time. If you work with expectant mothers in this precarious position, listen to their needs and assure them of their parenting abilities.