Speaking with the adopting parents can be very stressful for both the birthmother and the potential adoptive parents. The birthmother has selected a couple that she likes and would now like to speak with them. The meeting is a time for the birthmother to ask any questions she may not have been able to answer by reading the adopting parentsí profiles.
The birthmother may want to prepare some questions she wants to ask the adopting couple such as how long they have been married, information about their other children, why do they want to adopt, how do they plan to discipline, or what values do they hope to instill in their children. The birthmother wants to gain a picture of the adoptive couple and how they would care for her child. The social worker or adoption professional will be present for the conversation to fix lulls in the conversations, help present questions, and keep everyone at ease. If the birthmother feels that the couple is not a match after the meeting, she should tell her adoption counselor. Speaking with the couple does not contract a definite match, and both sides should feel free to decline if they are uncomfortable.
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|Jennifer Mathes, Ph.D.|